Who’re you wearing?

Ah, Oscar night. That special night when Hollywood bigwigs get together and have one big mutual masturbation party. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Masturbation is great. I just wish they’d honored AMERICAN SNIPER. The war has cost us so much. It has taken so many from us, made so many people suffer. Something that makes such a mark on our psyche must be honored. And, it was such a well-acted flick! Oh well. I guess in the end it doesn’t matter (it really doesn’t. Viewership fell by a few million this year http://www.thewrap.com/oscar-ratings-collapse-what-a-16-drop-means-for-the-live-telecast/). That movie made a ton of cash, and we saw it, and we know what’s good. I’m not arguing one way or the other for the politics of the movie or its psychological bent. Mr. Kyle believed what he believed, and he did what he did. I’m not taking sides here. It’s just that it was part of a war that has affected the entire world. And it would’ve been only decent for Oscar to acknowledge something far greater than itself.

Anyhow. I’m happy Julianne Moore got awarded for STILL ALICE. And, BIRDMAN’s win was great. Too bad Keaton didn’t get Best Actor. The clothing was nice to look at… but then again, what the fuck. I used to think the women looked fabulous in their gowns… and they do, but, my God, it just reduces them to a fucking object. And as usual the men rise above that… they’re all covered up, looking sleek, while the women are there with their tits hanging out. It’s so annoying (and weirdly reminds me of the feminists’ pet peeve about Fifty Shades Of Grey: that the man was clothed, while the woman was naked. Check out my previous posts.). Lately I’ve heard some bitching amongst women that, well, the actresses don’t get asked anything more than “who’re you wearing?” Well, if they make their looks their number one priority, then of course THAT is what will garner the most attention. Don’t dress to the fucking nines, show off your tits and ass, and then expect to be asked questions about the future of mankind. No one is going to be interested in any of that shit when you’re standing there with your tits out (hello, Jennifer Lopez. Or, should I say, hello titties.). Why would they? Women have shown the world for centuries that looking fabulous is their thing. It’s our weapon, our source of income, our power, our identity, our reason for being. Fuck! What’ve we done with ourselves?! Women spend billions upon billions of dollars on looking good. And – coming back to the point – if someone keeps treating you a certain way, it’s because you’ve let them. Reporters have learned, through years of award shows and the like, that it’s perfectly okay to focus on an actress’s physical appearance. We let them think it’s okay. Now I have nothing against folks showing off their bodies. These ladies have obviously spent hours in the gym, and it shows. And why shouldn’t they show themselves off? Go for it, I say. Flaunt what you got. BUT. If that’s what you’re desperately gonna go after… if that’s what you’re gonna put on display… then that’s what your audience will focus on.

That being said, I thought Margot Robbie looked best. And, I have to say, once I saw that picture, I was so stunned by how amazing she looked, that I did NOT think: “I wonder if she knows how to best solve the ISIS issue.” I was thinking about how starkly the red of her lips stood out against that pale palette of skin and blonde hair… and then that killer gown… wow. Beauty is a powerful thing. When someone looks that gorgeous, you just want to drink in that image – you really don’t want to think about that person’s opinion of world politics. Maybe this is a reflection of our intellectual evolution: we’re still at the point where we’re stopped by physical beauty. We need to train ourselves to look beyond that, to the intellectual worth of a person. Then again, there’s probably that question in the reporter’s mind: “she looks stunning. What if I ask her a serious question and she comes off as a complete moron and just ruins it?” Wouldn’t that be awful?

But onto something more productive. How do we solve the red carpet problem? Of course the designers should be acknowledged for their talent. But “who’re you wearing?” should not be the very first question reporters ask an actress. They should first ask her a few questions about significant community and world issues; then, and only then, will they get the chance to ask her whose design she is wearing. If the only question they have for her is about her clothes, then they will not be permitted to ask her that; and the actress should not answer. After all, she did not get there because of the clothes: she got there through acting talent. This will accomplish two things at once: it will elevate the actress to something more than a mere pretty object; and it will also make her (if she hadn’t previously) read more about community and world events in preparation for her red carpet appearance. If anyone has any more suggestions, I’d love to hear from you!


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