DON’T BUY THAT HOUSE

I have it! I have figured it out. We’re all like the chickens and cows being grown so they can die and become food for someone else. Everyday we get up, do our thing, scratch a bit in the dirt so we can find food, or eat what’s given to us. Something or someone out there is protecting us, but they’ll also kill us.

We’re here, and we’re alive, but we don’t know what or who’s out there, and most of the time, we’re doing what our parents told us, or what we were taught in school, or what our friends do. A big part of that crap? We buy shit we don’t need, then spend decades trying to pay for it. Like… houses.

Earlier today, my boss told me, “I need you to do all this extra work from now on. And oh, you won’t get paid anything more for it.”

I had a fit. But, as much as I screamed, I knew, I could simply leave. We can all just simply leave. But, most of the time, we don’t. Why? Because finding another job sucks, and the uncertainty will make your life a hell when you have to pay a mortgage. It’s easier just to stay in the barrel.

The plain fact is that all the material crap we have in our lives just ties us down. I mean, look at what we all have to do each day to pay for the shit we have. You have to get up early, fight your way through a bunch of fools on the road, and go to a place so we can deal with people we hate. Then we eat crap that’s bad for us to make time pass faster. We’re all just waiting for death. Trying somehow to make this gorgeous day vanish, so we can go home and then come back and do the same stupid thing again and again and again. Think about it. Why the heck do we even say “have a good weekend!” Good motherfucking weekend, indeed. What’s the point, when you’ll just have to come back to work again with a bunch of crazy clowns?

Gandhi, when he died, had very few possessions: a pair of sandals, a watch, a pair of glasses. Yet this fella freed an entire nation from another helpful nation. Gates probably had shit when he started Microsoft. Well, I’m pretty sure he didn’t own three cars and a house. Think about that.

Your possessions stop you from living. When you have a lot of shit, you’re more concerned with protecting it and paying for it than anything else.

The next time someone tells you a house is equity, just walk away, since you cannot really tell them to go fuck themselves. Do you know how much pain you have to go through to cash in on equity? YEARS of working for some asshole. And the entire time, you’re getting older and sicker. And then you have to fix everything that goes wrong—sucks if you’re not a mechanic. Sure that lawn looks fabulous—but you’re so tired by the assholes at work that you just want to sit on the couch and watch crap while comforting yourself with a favorite drink. Assholes can move in next door to you, or across the street, and play basketball on your car. And then, hopefully, the assholes on Wall Street won’t fuck up the economy and make the price of your house fall. If not, your house is worth shit. Where the fuck is the equity in that?

And you know, it’s an odd thing, but people who spout the kind of utter dumb drivel—like a house automatically translating to equity—usually DON’T own a house. The ones who do own a house never talk about equity since they are usually in the midst of some problem with that wonderful house: the washer, the dryer, the lawn, the water, the gas, something.

Until you are absolutely sure you want to become part of that community you’re in, DON’T BUY that house. Do you love that piece of masonry so much that you’re willing to give up years of your life for it? THAT’s what you should be asking before you buy a house.

Once you eliminate that kind of soul-sucking, life-killing, fat-accumulating, addiction-acquiring debt, you can truly live. You can move at the drop of a hat. You’re not tied to a well-paying job that you detest. You’re free to go anywhere and explore your world.

And maybe even figure out how to turn the gears of the universe.

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